There was a time, when you were just a lil' guppy, that cartoons were real and French fries were all you wished was on the menu. Peeing in your bed was like, totally normal and mom helped you go number two. With juice box in hand and a carefree "no homework yet" attitude, your main purpose on this earthly plane was to make a mess out of everything. Destruction was unavoidable for anything you put your sticky paws to, the bedroom walls were your crayon canvas and you explored the new world with your mouth, jamming in any and everything you could wrap your chubby little digits around. Basically, "dirty"' was just your mother's word for what you called "fun"!
Some of the best of times were had on the day after rainy days. Once the rain ceased it was time to jump into every puddle you could dunk your boots in. With little regard to how muddy or full of soggy leaves they were, and no real idea how deep they might be, you would just send it and stomp your tiny torpedo legs, splashing each and every puddle you crossed out of existence as your poor mother's futile shouting faded in the background.
Sometimes I wonder what would happen if puddles jumped on kids instead. Little Timmy, just strolling along the sidewalk when suddenly, WOMP, he'd get swallowed by a giant wet explosion, like an orca feeding on penguins. Interesting mental image, n'est-ce pas?
Although I guess in some way water does get its eventual revenge on us puddle stompers, in the form of hurricanes and tsunamis and floods. Water can't be destroyed no matter how hard you try, so don't even think about it. And water droplets are quite the gossip mavens. The word about the kid that stomped on them while they tried to some sleep gets around the grape vine pretty fast, if you know what I mean. So next time you get soaked in a rainstorm or get caught in a mean undertow, just keep in mind that you had it coming after all those puddles you stomped and all the water particles you disturbed way back when.
So, where were we, where are we, what time is it and how did Icelandic kids get so good at snowboarding? Ah yes, the Icelandic word Hoppipolla means "jumping in puddles". It also happens to be the name of the beanie brand you will see such bandied names as Helgason brothers, Stale Sandbech, Gulli Gudmundsson, Alek Oestreng, Lonnie Kauk, Toni Kerkela, Kevin Backstrom, Erik Botner and Kalle Ohlson sporting to keep their noggins toasty and in tune with the latest stylings of snowboard enthusiasts.
Holy shit, did I just say that? I must be delirious… I'm just gonna stop talking for a couple of minutes and let you watch this team edit while I gather my thoughts...